The Goodness of God Is Worth More Than the Inerrancy of Scripture

"The ultimate question is whether the doctrine of the goodness of God or that of the inerrancy of Scripture is to prevail when they conflict. I think the doctrine of the goodness of God is the more certain of the two. Indeed only that doctrine renders this worship of Him obligatory or even permissible. 
To this some will reply ‘Ah, but we are fallen and don’t recognise good when we see it.’ But God Himself does not say we are as fallen as that. He constantly, in scripture, appeals to our conscience: ‘Why don’t you judge for yourselves what is right? [Luke 12:57] — ‘What fault hath my people found in me? [Jer 2:5]. And so on.”

-CS Lewis

Matter Over Mind

If I don't feel my pulse beating in time with the universe
and the breath entering and escaping my lungs
if all I know is the roaring howl of a
distracted, fragmented, anxious, fragile mind
then I fall through the hole
and no one can find me in the blackness.

Goddess: A Love Letter

"I want you to be disappointed and heartbroken
as the idols come crashing down from the shelf
and shatter on the ground into millions of pieces
their shrapnel ripping your heart apart with betrayal.

I don't want this because I'm vindictive
I take no pleasure in any pain
but because it's the only way you'll get that this love
is the stripping away of everything non-essential
so you can know
there was never anything
standing
between
us."

"Love Sprinkler," Cartoon by nakedpastor David Hayward

Leaving Christianity Playlist

Sometimes I lose my faith. This is the soundtrack when that happens:

Hozier-"Take Me to Church"

"Every Sunday's getting more bleak
Fresh poison each week."

Wicked-"No Good Deed"

"One question haunts and hurts
Too much,
Too much to mention
Was I really seeking good?
Or just seeking attention?"

Sarah McLachlan-"Dear God"

"The hurt I see helps to compound
That Father, Son, and Holy Ghost
Is just somebody's unholy hoax."

Mutemath-"Odd Soul"

"I once was a son
Now I'm on my own"

Within Temptation-"The Truth Beneath the Rose"

"Pray for me cause I have lost my faith in holy wars
Is paradise denied to me cause I can't take no more?"

Within Temptation-"All I Need"

"Don't tear me down for all I need
Make my heart a better place
Give me something I can believe
Don't tear me down
You've opened the door now, don't let it close"

Calvin Harris, Florence Welch-"Sweet Nothing"

"It isn't easy for me to let it go

Cause I've swallowed every single word
And every whisper, every sigh
Eats away this heart of mine
And there is a hollow in me now

So I put my faith in something unknown
I'm living on such sweet nothing
But I'm tired of hope with nothing to hold"

Jennifer Knapp-"Inside"

"Do this and don't do that
Which you think you can't take back
Well, who in the hell
Do you think you are?"

Janelle Monae-"Cold War"

"So you think I'm alone
But being alone is the only way to be
When you step outside
You spend life fighting for your sanity."

Jewel-"Goodbye Alice in Wonderland"

"Yes a heart can hallucinate
If it's completely starved for love
It can even turn monsters
Into angels from above."

U2-"Stand Up Comedy"

"I can stand up for hope, faith, love
While I'm getting over certainty
Stop helping God across the road like a little old lady."

Idina Menzel-"Let it Go"

"And the fears that once controlled me
Can't get to me at all
It's time to see what I can do
To test the limits and break through." 

Foxes-"Holding Onto Heaven"

"Can't take it cause you think nobody sees what you're doing to me
I'm telling you guilt is in your eyes
I hate what you've done
What you've made me become
Don't sleep
Face the night."

Panic! At the Disco-"This is the Gospel"

"And truth be told I never was yours." 

U2-"Invisible"

"It's like the room just cleared of smoke
I didn't even want the heart you broke
It's yours to keep
You just might need one."

Not Allowed In

You were so preoccupied with what you thought you had to keep out
you didn't see all the beauty you weren't letting in.

Human beings put fences
where God plants sprawling, flower-filled meadows.

You were too afraid to err on the side of inclusion
because you didn't want to offend the sensibilities of the self-declared orthodox.
So we received lip service
and they received power to draw the lines in the sand.

Here we are,
on the other side
cut out, excluded
but told, "You're welcome here,
and I understand your concerns
just understand that these people are wounded
and they need this place to be conservative
because the risks of being too conservative are less than of being liberal
and we can't rock that boat."

Never mind that people like me had been wounded by the arrows you were helping them forge.

In our quiet talks you
pitted their hurt, their stories,
against mine
as more worth protecting, more worth believing.

In enabling them, you lost me.

It's not that their hurts weren't real
it's just that you didn't want to publicly affirm
that mine were too.

"It's not enough to tell me that you care

When we both know your words are empty air." 

-Florence Welch

"You own everything that happened to you. Tell your stories. If people wanted you to write warmly about them, they should have behaved better."

-Anne Lamott

Stuart Harlan Cone

Yours is the name I want to speak to this dark night of one-thousand regrets
In hopes that with it's utterance you would break forth incarnate
made from the milky threads of distant galaxies and the dust of millions of stars,

Forming into the one person
whose loss has left us with an
empty, black sky.

I speak your name with reverence and trepidation
like holy words from an ancient prayer
but you do not appear.

And yet this longing won't go away.
The agony hope won't go away.

Human

There is no more tidy faith to ride the waves of this life
No more fearsome ambition to feed my hunger for success

There's only these:
words and visions in my head
pounding out color.
Everywhere flashing
the royal purple, blue and gold
through my mind
and across my eyes.

Characters of ignoble intent running through my imagination
destroying kingdoms and waging war against the tyranny of the status quo
all of this
all of these
and the light of the waves.

I know
the final score
and how the film will come to its end.

We all want to know the future
but I never wanted to find out
my long trudge towards death
in all its gory detail.

Yet here I am
with the knowledge of good and evil
running through my veins
fueling my racing,
fragile,
heartbeat.

Completely, utterly, desperately, beautifully, broken
human.

Stripped Bare

What I feel, is that,
I'm breaking apart and I'm not quite sure who I am.

Because I used to define myself by
achievement/thinness/health/religion/workaholism/intelligencce

and now I'm
worn out/overwhelmed/stressed/unhealthy/feeling stupid

I resent the healthy, the people accomplishing,
because how dare they
when I can't
and how come
it's not being taken away from them
when it's being taken away from me?

Is it my fault?
Is there something I could do to cure myself
and I'm not, and I should, and what's wrong with me?

"Those who were not my people
I will call ‘my people,’
and her who was not beloved
I will call ‘my beloved."

What if

at the end of all of this

the only thing I'll know about myself 

isn't that I'm the healthiest

most accomplished

smartest

hardest worker

but that I'm deeply, desperately loved

deserving of forgiveness,

and hope

and all things pure, good, true,

and restful. 

The Vase

And the place where the
flowers stood, orange and flowing
stands empty, wanting.

This Is Who I Belong To

Iron cracking into bone, agonal breathing, screaming. 

This is Who I belong to. 

Side of flesh ripped and gushing the elements of the sacraments I partake in

This is Who I belong to.

Laughing with his friends on the shore
while he makes them breakfast

This is Who I belong to

The one who did so many good, miraculous, healing things
that the world could not contain them all in on parchment

This is Who I Belong To 

When she was shamed for pouring her priceless gift on his feet
instead of selling it for coin
he honored all she had to offer

This is Who I Belong To

extending his love and wisdom to an adulterous heretic

This is Who I Belong To. 

To the antagonizing BELITTLING  fighting GATEKEEPERS |lines|In|the|Sand|:

Though you will feast with me
you do not set the parameters of the feast
thought you will sit by me
you do not choose who enters this banquet
(neither do I, thank Heaven)

the seating arrangements were never up to us
and no matter what you insist upon

the man who invites all to the wedding feast

Is Who I Belong To.